I saw Orion tonight. Often, he is lost to me, swallowed by the city lights. I frequently walk at night these days, because I feel safe thanks to the same city light that obfuscates my view of familiar constellations. So, tonight, while driving to the train station, I had to pull over in the middle Edmonds just to look up through the open roof of my jeep. There he was, splayed across the night sky, connecting me to the place and time in my life where I last felt home in a location.
My former neighborhood, lit only by occasional porch light at the end of long driveways, did not provide a safe opportunity to walk at night. It was dark enough, however, that for ten years while standing in my front yard, I watched the constellations shift position by season. Over the years, I noticed that constellations moved across the night sky. I wondered at the density of stars in the band of the Milky Way. The trees stood guard on the perimeter of our yard, making me feel protected and safe.
The light cast by street lamps and the sight of a full compliment of stars are mutually exclusive. Here in the city, the cover of light provides a sense of security. At home in the woods, my friends, the constellations, provide a sense of belonging to a place. Here, I work to spot any star to cast a wish and, on the clearest of nights, only the stars of the highest magnitude are visible. There, I see the stars without effort – even the smallest contribute to the stellar spray and my wishes are cast among the multitude. The light of the city makes me appreciate the dark and the dark of the woods leads me to appreciate the light of the city.
I have this informal philosophy that I can be happy anywhere, it is just a matter of effort. Actually, it is one of the central tenets of my practice of finding joy. When I’m missing the sight of the stars, longing to be back in the front yard of my house, I have to be honest and acknowledge that I am doing so while standing in the center of a city where I can access theaters, concerts, movies and people I love in a matter of minutes. And, while reveling in the sight of a clear starry night, I am also longing to be closer to the comforts and convenience of urban living. I cannot help but point out that life and the universe is grand indeed.
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